Citizens of the world!
I come to you as a prophet, a predictor of destruction! I hear the footsteps of doom clattering in my mind’s ear! Pay heed!
Facebook is evil! Burn it down! Repent you fools! The end is nigh! Darn it, where’s my gong?!
Also, populace of the world, know that Facebook has been a useful tool. It allowed people to broadcast their lives and interact with others in ways unseen heretofore (great word, I know). Families have been reconnected! Facebook has helped many world citizens begin their domains of commerce by interacting with a greater web of humanity! What brilliance!
But, citizens of the world, it’s a lie. A lie!
Facebook is a lie because people on Facebook are untruthful!
Not utterly, that would be too obvious!
No, citizens of the world, they are cunning.
There are truths within the lies. That’s why you believe them!
You want me to give you an example? I will. This prophet delivers.
You see someone update a short sentence or paragraph about their life, saying how good things are. This is called a status! Now people viewing this status sees how good life is for this human. Or maybe, he posts a photograph of himself smiling! The world is witness to the dimples of this smiling citizen! Who can tell the number of photographs taken before the desired result was achieved? The world only sees a collection of instances that tells a carefully selected story! That story is, by default, a lie!
The danger lies not in the lies. The danger is that we believe them! Lies that are known as lies have no power! The lie of Facebook is how humans portray themselves. The danger is that we think that’s who they really are!
Citizens of the world, look around! Gaze at the cities that stand poised to fall, great constructions that will burn with the vicious fire of the artificial! No matter how firm your hold on the truth, a perpetual river of lies will wash away even the most steadfast bedrock!
It’s already begun!
Citizens of the world are thirsting for untainted waters!
Many have quit! They seek truth!
Authenticity is in demand!
Truth is the only commodity; lies are counterfeit currency!
Facebook is a black market!
It’s the only way.
If you do as I say, as a prophet in these dark times, there may be yet hope!
Perhaps the damage can be contained to a small pocket of time in the Twenty-First Century! Perhaps the erosion of truth can be reversed!
Years from now, you might actually experience a true moment with another human! You might look into their eyes, not their photograph’s eyes!
You might ask them a real question! You’ll converse! You’ll connect!
You’ll reminisce about these evil times!
You’ll ask other citizens, “Remember ‘Likes’?”
“Remember how it was getting an internet pat on the back for a joke well said, or an opinion well stated?”
They’ll remember! You’ll remember! Good citizens, you’ll feel the itchy burn of regret at the time wasted! You’ll remember how approval felt like a cheap drug, because you depended on it! You’ll recall that it wasn’t who liked anything anymore; it was about how many likes there were total!
But there is hope! I come to you now in this dark hour – where’d I put that freaking gong?! – Repent!
O’ citizens of the world, deactivate or forever be locked in a cage of lies!
Quit! It’s the only key to salvation!